If we are used to be in an ongoing spiritual process, working intensely with ourselves, it can be overwhelming when things begin to come to us, and we get what we desire. Especially if we get massive love, money, help and joy. We almost have an impulse to stop it, because it is so much out of our comfort zone.
But let us not stop it. It is not more noble to suffer than to have fun, although we can feel completely guilty if we exchange our pain for joy.
In Denmark we have a saying “It has to be painful before it can be well” and it says it all. We get a bad conscience when it is going well, and we feel something might be wrong. Culturewise we are so imprinted to work hard, achieving, being responsible, that we often miss all the fun.
There is a time for everything. Sometimes we must work hard, to get through our process or work, and sometimes we must really enjoy life. My son is at his father’s place every second weekend and I always do lists that requires two months work, and I expect to achieve it in 2-3 days, both work and cleaning and social events, and it is completely impossible.
It is an enormous pressure we put on ourselves, and if something unexpected happens, it feels like a big disturbance, and we get focused on our delay. So many times we miss enjoying the unexpected. It could be that the unexpected is a gift of a lifetime, or our main challenge, and that everything else will fall into place if we just give it attention. But we will never know if we reject it and see it as a disturbance.
The definition of a process; “a process is a set of activities that interact to achieve a result”. So when you think of it, we have a lot of different processes going on, not only our spiritual process. We are dealing with our work process, our family process, our love process, our social process, and maybe we have a house process and a garden process or a moving apartment process. We have a lot going on, and we have to prioritize and choose every single moment.
We are used to exactly that prioritizing and choosing, and when everything shifts and we start receiving what we desire, we often receive it as something unexpected. Maybe it is an invitation for having more fun and loosing up, or to enjoy life in any other way. Or maybe it is an invitation to lean back and see what is coming to you. Or it is an invitation to express yourself more in the world.
If we are used to be very self-disciplined and we suddenly do less, what will happen then? I had a vision in a very deep spiritual workshop where I saw life as a stream that we should just lean into. And I saw life itself would give impulses to us when we should take action in different areas of our life, so we can just take the impulses and go with them, we do not have to figure out the timing of things and constantly initiating new things and projects. The impulses will come when we listen.
It was a big relief for me, as I always thought I should initiate everything myself. It was also difficult to wait for the impulses, not letting the mind control the tempo. It is a good idea to decide to pay attention to all kinds of impulses, also disturbances. Many times disturbances are the only way life can reach us, because we are planning and controlling our life and time so much. So if we listen and maybe leave a little time unplanned, we would discover our impulses better. There are so many gifts to us that we are missing, because we do not pay attention.
The problem is that many of us do not understand the concept of receiving more and doing less. When we do less it almost feels like we are unemployed, and we are so defined by working hard and being responsible and serious, that we cannot identify with being unemployed. We should be careful that we are not missing our big shifts in life on that account. It is a good idea to look at all our identifications points, all our masks and roles and set ourselves free.
The impulses are not obligations verses freetime fun. The impulses are about how to live a joyful life with everything we are doing. And taking action when the timing is right, instead of whipping ourselves to do more and more, and missing the timing and missing the opportunities because we are not listening. Subconsciously we do a lot of crazy things to hold ourselves back, so we have to consciously choose to receive more, and pay attention to what life brings. And we will be pleasantly surprised.